My Elsa

 
Elsa's place of preference.  Minus me in this photo, my legs would be under her.


It's early, 3:00 am early.   I can feel the weight of Elsa across my legs; we've been over this already, many times.  Only an hour earlier I asked her to please join me on the other side of the pillow where she can touch me but is not "on" me.  She has breached the barrier again; as she has been doing more often.  Elsa likes to touch; so she has taken to lying across my legs.   I don't  mind except for when I wake up and can't move.  She is like the weight of an elephant.

As I lay awake my mind drifted off to Luke.  His spot at night was across my husbands legs.   He would start somewhat in the middle but always ended up over my husbands legs; leaving little room to move.  The things you learn to love out of love.   

The thought of Luke brought me to lunch the day before.   I had my dog sitter over for lunch.  We enjoyed a tomato salad with smoked goat cheese, cherry and pumpkin seed quinoa and strawberry/pecan dessert.  Yummy.  Our conversation went to Luke at one point; she told me how blessed she felt having been able to meet him.  She'd only sat for me twice before Luke passed but knew he was a special dog. It is nice to hear that his memory lives on with others

My mind came back to the moment with a lead weight on my legs.  Smiling I tried to adjust myself under the density which is Elsa. Then I remembered Elsa crushing Luke with her weight.  He too tried to adjust under the pressure without getting up and leaving.  She is something; and these are the moments that sink into your memory.  For now it is Elsa and I; and I drifted off smiling with the weight and knowing that I am her pillow for the moment.