Watching a movie and I’m watching them. Supervision.
I don’t know how many times I’ve written about this subject. It is a highly important discussion to have and there is a great need to learn more about the two together.
We had one of our Grandsons with us last week for several days. He is probably the one who is drawn to the dogs the most. This fact alone requires more vigilance and education. I spent a great deal of time teaching him what it means to ask for consent (to ask if they want to be touched).
Elsa adores children, but she does not like hugs (normal). So we have a “no dog hug zone” in our home and all the Grandchildren are given the “no dog hugging” talk. This is a good rule to have in your home.
Riggs is a weary guy, he is nervous around the kids. Although he is also drawn to them but is suspicious of their high voices, fast movements and funny smells. The harder they try the worse it is. In fact, my Grandson said “Riggs has suspicious eyes.” He was right, he does have suspicious eyes and because they are light in color, they look even more suspicious.
My Grandson was very willing to learn; so I created some scenarios that he could clearly understand at the age of 5. I approached my Grandson and pet his head and arms and asked how he would feel if someone he didn’t know was doing this? He said “embarrassed.” I asked if he would like someone to touch him if he didn’t want to be touched? The answer was “no” he would not like it.
We then moved onto the consent part. I told him to leave his hand hanging down beside him with his palm out. If Riggs moved close to his hand he could tickle him under the chin; if he did not move closer then we just leave him alone. I explained that I do this all the time and sometimes he just doesn’t want to be touched and that’s okay. He repeated after me “ya that’s okay if he doesn’t want to be touched.” Far too often humans think there is something wrong with a dog that isn’t interested in interactions.
Teaching children is very different compared to educating adults. They need more examples of the same thing but about them and how they would feel. They really understand when you break it down for them. I often use terms like “sad, cry, happy, scared and like etc.” when explaining how things we do make our dogs feel.
Dogs and children can be wonderful, but it can also be very dangerous. It is our job to protect and educate both our children and our dogs. We should always advocate for our dogs because if something goes wrong, it’s going to be the dog that takes the blame.
When it comes to children and dogs together, you can never be too safe. Visiting children are more difficult because your dog may not be use to them. If your dog is uncomfortable around children, respect that. Allow them to set the limits and approaches. Dogs who are not use to children need to be around children without interacting before any interaction ever occurs.
Take it slow, positive baby steps are required. And NEVER, EVER force a dog “to go see or say hi,” when they are not moving forward or moving away. Sometimes a dog just wants to move away, and that’s a good thing which they should be allowed to do.
My Grandson could see when Riggs was uncomfortable but did not know what to do with that information at the age of 5. That’s our job, that’s why supervision is so very important.